My best friend is having an affair. She claims this guy is the love of her life, but won't leave her husband because she has 2 small children. I'm trying not to judge, but the real issue is that she wants to use me as her "alibi" so she can get away to be with her lover. How can I say no without her thinking I am judging her?

Kevin says:  You obviously can’t or you wouldn’t be asking the question. And if she were really your best friend, she wouldn’t be putting you in this awkward position. Here’s what you say, “Carolyn, we’ve talked about this before, and you know how I feel about your relationship with Gary. I have to live my life in a way that I can be proud of. I simply can’t be your alibi so that you can sneak around on your husband. I also won’t lie for you. I say this so you can make an informed decision about how to structure your personal life.” Then, let her make the next move. She probably won’t be happy with you, but if you offend someone by doing the right thing, you’re better off without the friend-inflicted drama.
Beth says:   If you know a friend is cheating, you have to decide how you can live comfortably with that information.  You never know what's going to end up happening and if you truly don't want to come across as judgmental, you have to find a way to be supportive without becoming directly involved.  It is perfectly reasonable to say, "Look I am here for you if you want to talk about this, but I just can't in good conscience be your alibi."